Voice of an Angel
by Popkov
Summary: A lonely and nearly broken soul is drawn to a voice that gives him a new hope and new life. Based on an idea from, and co-written by StraightedgeWingZero.
1. Chapter 1

Raison d'être. French. Means "A reason for existence". A simple phrase laced with quite the destructive potential. Oh sure, it's harmless when it's just some posh French phrase someone spurts out to make themselves sound that much smarter. Most don't care for such things anyway. A stupid question, isn't it? Does a person need a reason to live? Surely that's a silly question?

To most people, yes. But not Shinji Ikari. Not since he was left with a man he didn't know by a father who didn't want him, and only days after his mother has died. In a blink of an eye he lost his family, his confidence, his pride... and now, it seems... even more.

Thought flooded his distraught mind. Why me? Why now? Why here? Why... WHAT THE-?

!

The limo's side mirror missed him by millimetres. In his hurried retreat Shinji tripped and fell on his back. Luckily it was grass, not concrete that met the back of his head. Still hurt though.

"You! Boy! Are you alright?" - a woman's voice called out.

Shinji sat up and stared at her. She was of an average height with long - reaching past her waist in fact - blonde hair. She seemed to have been in the middle of tying it as she pulled a long ribbon out of it and shoved it into her pocket. She was wearing a dark overcoat, underneath which a black business suit was visible.

"Hey! Can you hear me? Are you alright? Are you hurt?" - the woman asked in a worried voice. After getting a nod and a shake of the head, respectively, her voice grew angry - "What were you thinking?"

At this Shinji laughed. The woman was startled. It was not a sad laugh. A laugh of self-pity, of complete disregard of one's life's worth.

"What was I thinking? I... I don't know. I wasn't thinking anything. Except..." - here a change came over him. He leaned forward and grabbed his head with both hands, crying - "Why am I so useless?"

He flinched when he felt a hand on his shoulder. It was the woman. She sat down on the grass next to him. He didn't look up.

"What's your name, boy?" - she asked in a kind tone.

"Shinji... Shinji Ikari" - Shinji replied. The woman's hold tightened. Though uncomfortable, Shinji still didn't look up.

"T-tell me..." - the woman asked, her voice trembling slightly - "... are you... Yui Ikari's boy?"

Startled, Shinji looked up. Their eyes met. There was a strange change over the woman. She grew very excited and suddenly embraced him. Shinji was about to pull away when he found that his body wouldn't move. It felt good. More than good, it felt... familiar.

His brain still jumbled and tumbled over this development when he heard it. The song. No, not a song. A song needs words, recognizable sounds which, in turn, form words. No, this was... This was an emotion. Happiness. Or was it sadness? No, it was something more universal, something that eclipses all others. Love. Love washed over him, and with it... came memories.

"A-aunt... Aunt Helena?" - Shinji's voice trembled. He did not believe. He COULD NOT believe. Then the embrace tightened. It was all the proof he needed. His arms moved on their own accord. Tears, unbidden, streamed from his eyes.


	2. Chapter 2

"This court rules in favour of Ms Douglas Helena, who is hereby granted full custody of Ikari Shinji."

The sound of the hammer sent chills through Shinji's spine. It signalled yet another point of no return in his life. He glanced tentatively in Misato's direction. She looked calm enough.

Misato was anything but calm. She was filled with humiliation and anger. At Shinji, at Helena, and Gendo. Especially Gendo. She bit her lip to hold back the curses.

"I have no time to deal with these childish things. Captain, as the currently appointed guardian it will be your responsibility to salvage this catastrophe. Dismissed." - Gendo's voice did not betray even a hint of emotion, but the message was clear: 'You have no-one but yourself to blame for this mess.'

The worst part was that she knew it to be true. If only she did not over-react the way she did. If only she rounded up Section 2 to retrieve him sooner. If only... She cut herself off. It was too late. The point of no return has been passed.

Helena put a hand on Shinji's shoulder. It saddened her to feel his shoulder jerk ever so slightly under her hand. She gave it a firm, but gentle squeeze to reassure the boy, to no avail. The boy was as tense as someone ready to run at a moment's notice.

'I guess we have all been running away' - she thought, glancing in Misato's direction. Despite the other woman's hostility, Helena bode her no ill will. She simply wanted what's best for Shinji. Sure, Misato meant well, but...

Helena smiled. A bitter, regretful smile.

Shinji sighed, leaning back on the bench. Helena told him about the paperwork she had yet to fill and how she would be awhile. As such, he was to wait for Walter, who would take him home. At the latest he'd be there in 10 minutes. With nothing better to do, Shinji simply let his mind wander.

Motivation is such a nice word isn't it? It is also one of the most popular discussion topics. What motivates people? The answer seems to not only depend from person to person but is also situation-specific. Still confused? You should be. Everyone is, because they never give it any thought.

What motivates a man to throw away his life and become the willing puppet, his actions whispered to him from the shadows? What motivates a woman to protect a child that was never hers to begin with? What motivates a child to fight, against all odds, not only against others, but also against his very self?

As unbelievable as it may sound, everything in this world has a reason. So what, would you say, is the reason such questions are never asked? It's simple, really...

We fear what we might discover in the answer.

Shinji was taken out of his reverie by a hand on his shoulder. Looking up he saw, to his surprise, Misato. She had a curious expression on her face. Stone-faced, Shinji shrugged off her hand and got up, turning his back to her and crossing his arms.

As he did so, he saw sadness and regret etched all too clearly on her delicate features. It was heart-breaking. But it was too late. Far too late.

"What do you want, Misato?" - Shinji asked meekly. He tried to sound angry. He was angry. But more than anything he was tired, tired of the endless spiral of despair his life has become. And Misato was an all too clear a proof of it.

"Shinji... I... "- Misato trailed off. She was not sure of what to say. She didn't even know why she approached him. 'Stupid, stupid, stupid! It's too late anyway. So why...?'

"-one" - Shinji's voice was so soft that only the last tiny part of what he said reached her ears. But the message was all too clear. Against her better judgement, she spoke out.

"What?"

"I said, leave me alone!" - Shinji all but yelled, swinging around and pointing an accusing finger at her. Tears streamed from his eyes, his face torn between anguish and anger. - "Leave me alone! Just like my father! Just like-"

Time seemed to slow down as Shinji uttered the last sentence.

"Just like _you_ did!"

SLAP

A portion of Shinji's left cheek was starting to turn red. In his shock, the tears stopped. He froze. A moment later, without a second glance, he sped off.

"Oh my God! Shinji! I'm sorry! I-"

Before she could make a move, however, someone blocked her way. Blinded by guilt, she tried to push him off. A pair of slim, but strong arms gripped her. In one swift movement, she found herself on the bench. As he stepped back, she finally got a good look at him.

He was of a tall european man of around 50, his long black hair tied in a neat ponytail which reached just below his shoulders. A pair of wire-rimmed glasses were perched on his thin nose. His intelligent, but kind, brown eyes seemed to dive deep into your soul.

"Madame, please! Calm yourself!" - his voice seemed almost too young for him.

"But Shinji-!" - Misato tried to get up, only to be firmly, yet gently, pushed back down.

"I understand your distress, but believe me" - he added, in a gentle, yet urgent tone - "You would do more harm than good."

The truth of the words struck Misato like a hammer. She stopped struggling. She was suddenly tired, so very tired.

A peculiar smile lit up the man's face. It was a gentle, understanding smile. Maybe too understanding. Misato grabbed her head and sobbed uncontrollably.

Then the strangest thing happened. The man _patted_ her. Then, just as suddenly, he was off in the same direction as Shinji.

"Young master! Master Shinji!" - the man called out, slowing down to a walk. Despite the heat, and the fact that he wore a suit - black leather shoes, dark grey pants, white long-sleeve shirt (no tie, top button undone) and a black sleeveless jacket - and that he ran a few hundred metres non-stop at a pretty quick pace, he was neither flushed nor out of breath.

The courthouse was a few hundred metres away from the harbor. Here, people would ride their bikes, walk their dogs, have their lunches or just enjoy the day, sprawled on the grass.

Since Shinji fitted neither of those categories, he stood out like a sore thumb. He could be espied under one of the few trees, curled up and oblivious to the world, which was surely oblivious to him

"There you are, master Shinji." - the man greeted the boy warmly.

"Hey, Walter." - came Shinji's reply, a little muffled as he didn't raise his head.

Without a further ado, Walter took a seat next to the still distraught youth.

"She means well, you know." - he said, almost to himself - "That woman."


	3. Chapter 3

Even though it was the middle of the day, it was dark outside as the unexpected storm hit the city of Tokyo-3, outside one of its seemingly insignificant hospitals. The windows reverberated with every boom of the thunder and the rooms were flooded with the pale white light of each lightning strike. It seemed like an odd coincidence for it to coincide with one of the most world-impacting events of the decade that was unfolding in the maternity ward of that same hospital.

The mother, her short brown hair messy and wild, had her face was twisted in a pained grimace as she struggled. It must have been painful. But she seemed to draw an unimaginable amount of strength from the two people that were there with her, and whose hands she now fervently grasped.

On her right was a man of a medium stature with dark brown hair and beard. His glasses were precariously close to the end of his nose, but he paid no heed, his eyes darting with frightening speed between the face of his beloved wife and the wet nurse's, trying to reassure one and to draw reassurance from the other.

On her left was a woman with below-shoulder-length blonde hair, her eyes closed. She seemed surprisingly calm, given the situation. But a closer look would reveal the tightness of her grip, the furtive movement of the eyes behind the eyelids and her lips moving ever so slightly in silent prayer.

Then came a burst of light, so bright it even dazed the blonde woman despite her closed eyes. The crash of thunder that followed a moment later was so loud, it seemed that it came from the very room. The whole place seemed to shake and reverb along; the windows looked as if they were going to shatter; it even drowned out the last, loudest and most pained scream that escaped the expecting mother's lips.

In the silence that followed, a different sound reverberated through the room. A sound that brings joy to all that hear it, because it signifies the one thing that never ceases to amaze. The miracle of birth.

"No." - the mother said as the wet nurse had gotten ready to cut the cord. Then, she beckoned to the blonde woman. - "Would you... Please."

"Isn't he beautiful?" - the mother asked, her voice was soft and tired, yet filled with joy.

"Yes." - was all that the father seemed capable of saying.

"Is it normal for him to be crying so much?" - the mother asked the nurse who was about to head out.

"It is perfectly normal." - the nurse answered in a gentle tone and left the room.

"May I?" - the blonde woman asked.

"Of course." - the woman replied, in a 'do you even have to ask' voice.

The blonde woman cradled the fragile body of the newborn as if it were made of glass. The boy was wrapped in sheets so that only his face was visible. It was scrunched in an angry grimace as he wailed. She could not help but smile, feeling and, most importantly, _understanding_ the joy and wonder that his mother felt when she first beheld him. Using those feelings as a guide, she began to sing, softly at first, but gradually gaining in volume, carrying in it... love.

'Argghh... finally done.'

Helena slumped back in the chair, sighing tiredly. It was not even the amount of paperwork, but its _tediousness_ that sapped so much strength from her.

'Sign here, fill out your details there, rinse and repeat. Uugh.'

The sudden vibrating in her pocket nearly sent her flying from the chair. After rebuking herself for being so silly, she pulled out her cell phone and read the contents of the message.

"Rdy 4 stg2" was all it said. Yet it was like a shot of adrenalin into her system. She was suddenly alert, and felt strength returning to her limbs. She left the room with a newfound sense of purpose.

"Uuuggh..." - Misato groaned as she spat out the last of the bile and wiped her mouth with her hand. Ironically, a part of her mind was proud that it took her the better part of a dozen cans in a row before she had to run to the bathroom to "give it all up".

As she was washing her face she caught the look of herself in the mirror. To say that she looked dishevelled would be an understatement. Her hair was all over the place, many parts of it sticking out at the strangest of angles, bits of bile still stuck to the bottom parts. She had bags under her bloodshot eyes which were in stark contrast to her pale face; the water on her cheeks somehow making the tear trails even _more_ visible.

But worst of all were the eyes. They were listless, like that of a dying person who has finally given in. They were overflowing with a volatile mix of fear, angst, regret and self-hatred. It was a bitter irony, then, that Misato could not tell whether she was somehow strong enough to hang on to life, or too cowardly to let go of it. Not bothering to get the towel, she headed to the kitchen and sank into the nearest chair. In her mind, a single sentence repeated itself over and over: "If you tell me to pilot Eva, I will."

Then came Ramiel. It repelled all attacks with ease and struck down the city's only hope at victory, the mighty Evangelion, with impunity. A desperate plan was hatched and it would have succeeded, if not for fate deciding to intervene.

"We've gotten another energy reading building inside the target!" - Maya exclaimed

"No, not now!" - Misato almost screamed in desperation.

And then it came. The sky was suddenly illuminated by an energy beam that seemed to come from the heaven itself as it struck down Ramiel, melting right through its AT field, its massive bulk and incinerating its core. Then it was gone, leaving behind the colossal corpse of the angel.

The members of the instrumental committee were quietly eyeing each other warily. The urgency with which chairman Keele has demanded this meeting has disturbed them greatly. Very few possibilities existed that would explain such an unprecedented event. And neither was very favourable to their cause.

As Keele finally arrived, they turned their full attention to him, fully intent in getting answers. The old man silenced them with a wave of his hands.

"These were taken right after Ramiel's demise." - Keele announced gravely as he presented a series of images. Though blurry and indistinct, due to being taken at night _and_ while tracking an obviously fast-moving object, they made the council gasp. There, they could see a shape. A shape of a man, of a man... with wings.


	4. Chapter 4

Helena circled the dummy warily as if it was a live opponent, watching her as warily, looking for weaknesses. But it was simply a roughly human-shaped, faceless sandbag dangled on a chain from the ceiling, with its shapeless feet touching the ground.

With a silent, but resolute, breath, Helena began her attack. After swiftly closing in on the dummy, she went into a spin, bringing her arms down in front of her, using the combined momentum to bring her arms up, striking the dummy on the chin.

"_I... I enjoyed it."_

She crouched down, bending only one leg, while extending the other forward. She outstretched her arms above her head, holding them out wide, loose and relaxed, but in perfect position for lightning fast strikes at any part of her would-be opponent.

"_Thank you."_

Like a viper, she lashed out at the momentum-propelled leg, yanking it up high above her head, while at the same time going for the other leg. In one motion, she yanked it up, while swinging the first leg back down, causing the dummy to spin in mid-air before crashing back down.

"_Watch out!"_

Bending down slightly, she did a single spin. The moment she was facing the dummy again, she struck upwards in an uppercut that sent the dummy straight up into the ceiling. Once again the training room was filled with the noise of the rattling chain.

" _Get Down!"_

Quickly regaining her stance, she raised her arms, crossing it above her head. The moment the dummy's leg landed on top of them, she rose swiftly, pushing it upwards. This was complemented with a sweep under the other leg, which, once again, was already touching the floor. Before the dummy even had a chance to descend, she delivered a strike to its midriff that sent it swinging like a pendulum.

"_A-aunt Helena...?"_

As the dummy reached its peak height, Helena already prepared for it. By the time it started to descend, she already started into a terrifyingly fast spin, putting the strength of her entire body into the motion. Her arms were facing one direction, making her look, much like the sails on a windmill.

"_Madam, please!" _

"Yahh!" - with the strength born of rage and desperation, Helena delivered one final explosive strike, annihilating the dummy. Despite only the head remaining on its other end, the chain rattled as loudly as before. Sand and fabric rained all around her.

And with that something broke inside her. Dropping to her knees, she buried her face in her hands and cried like a mother that has lost her child.

They say that the road to Hell is paved with good intentions. I simply think that one will always pay for their sins. In my case... the sin of negligence.

I will never forget the last time I saw her. Yui was always beautiful, but on that day she was... serene. In her white dress, the glow of the setting sun enveloping her... it... it's like she was an angel.

We were in a park. The sun was already heading over the horizon. It was also my last day in Japan, and I spent it trying to talk Yui out of her crazy scheme.

"You've made your mind" - Yui's voice was soft but firm - "and so have I."

I followed her gaze to where Gendo was playing with Shinji. Well... Playing was the wrong word. Shinji was doing the playing. Gendo... Gendo just looked confused. From the very beginning it was obvious Gendo didn't know what to do as far as Shinji was concerned. To his credit, he tried his best.

"It's all for him, you know." - Yui sounded proud - "For his future."

"And what about the cost? What if it costs him... you?"

I couldn't take it. Yui was always crazy in her own way, but... to toy with her own life like that. I looked at her imploringly. But she just smiled that smile, so beautiful , so resolute. When Yui Ikari sets her mind on something, not even the Devil himself can stand in her way.

"Helena. I know you. There is something more to it. What aren't you telling me?"

Oh, Yui. I... How could I tell you? About my Father's findings? How could I tell you that you're working for people who had him killed?

So I simply walked away.

When the news reached me, I bottled up my feelings. My project was too important. I could not waste time. After a week, my colleagues were starting to get worried. "You're acting strange" they said, "what's wrong?" they asked. I simply told them to mind their own business. A week later, I couldn't hold it in any longer.

There was no explosion of emotions, no angry tantrum. Nothing was thrown, destroyed. No mess left behind, no room ruined. I simply drove myself home. As I entered, Walter was immediately at my side.

"You're home early, Ms Helena." - he remarked, looking at me with those piercing eyes - "Is everything alright?"

It was like the phrase flipped a switch in my brain. All I remember is taking a step and then the world suddenly started spinning.

I awoke on the sofa. I've been crying. I could still feel the fresh tears on my face. As I rose I spotted Walter walking towards me with a tray, laden with all that was necessary for an afternoon tea. I realized that the sun has long since gone down.

Walter set the tray on the coffee table. He didn't say anything but his ever-understanding, ever-soul-piercing eyes told me all.

"Walter?" - I found my voice as he was almost out the door.

"Yes, Miss?"

"Did... Did I say anything?"

"'Yui'... Miss." - and after a quick bow, he was gone.

After that I threw myself at my work with zeal. Years flew by like days. I was only vaguely aware of what has befallen Shinji since Yui's death, but I reasoned that as long as he got the care he needed, it did not matter. This was all for him, I reasoned. Oh God, Yui, I am so sorry.

Then the disaster struck. The aliens - for I refuse to associate these foul monsters with servants of the Lord - were already here and we were not yet ready. Then NERV - or should I say SEELE - brought out their trump card: the Evangelion. Using children for war. Sickening. Oh God, if only I knew.

It was bad enough to find out only after the second attack. But finding it out from the one I claimed to have cared for... that was a punishment. I remember when Shinji first confided in me. I dropped to my knees and begged him for forgiveness. His meek response only drove the nail deeper.

But my punishment was not to end there.

A concert; a song dedicated to the one I love as a mother; Shinji looking happier than I have ever seen him; seeing it all coming undone by a bullet intended for me.

Helena woke with a start.

"Miss Helena?" - Walter called out from behind the closed bedroom door. - "The phone. It's for you. It's the hospital"

Helena dived for the phone beside her bed like a drowning man dives for the rope.

Walter nearly got bowled over as Helena, still in her sleeping gown, almost flew out of the bedroom.

"Walter! Walte- It's Shinji! He's awake!" - she cut off his feeble protests about not being dressed - "I'll do it in the car! Come on!"

Walter thanked God that the car had tinted windows.

"Hey, Helena." - Shinji greeted her weakly as she burst in.

Helena worked hard on him dropping the 'Auntie'. "Makes me sound old!" - she used to say.

An hour later she was shooed off by an irate nurse as visiting hours were over.

Helena slumped tiredly on the way home. As excitement gave way to relief, she raised her head to hide the tears.

Just then her mobile rang; it was a message, which simply read: "she is here -Zack"


	5. Chapter 5

Tell me, how do _you_ deal with a crisis? Do you face it head-on, heedless of danger and take whatever comes with all the stoicism you can muster? Or do you retreat into that tiny corner of your mind, erecting as big a wall between you and the world, hoping, _praying_ for it to be over soon?

In the case of one Shinji Ikari... well, ok, let me lay it down for ya:

How would _you_ react if a 16-year-old black-haired Chinese girl - who you would swear looks 14 - was there, sitting cross-legged on the floor beside your bed, clad only in a set of plain dark green pyjamas, her brown eyes never leaving your form? And what if that same girl called you _master_, of all things?! And the best part - the proverbial cherry on this cake-full of strangeness? Every time there was a knock on your door, she would suddenly all but leap up, while brandishing a pair of butterfly swords - the way said swords were _unveiled_ made you turn your head away, lest you got accused of being a pervert - and take up a position beside the door - all the while making _no sound at all_!

No, really. I _dare_ you. Tell me.

Being the introverted sort, Shinji's mind wandered back, back, all the way to where it all started to go so very wrong.

Ironically enough, the day started off not just good, but positively perfect: it was the day he was finally discharged from the hospital. Yes, after a week of isolation, horrible hospital food and ever-less-frequent visits from Helena, he was finally heading back home. Sure, due to him needing another week to fully recuperate, in addition to the fact that he has not been to school since he started living with Helena, he'd have a whole two months' worth of schoolwork to catch up on. Well, he would have, if it wasn't for Helena assigning Walter as his personal tutor; they have actually managed to cover some materials in advance, leaving him free to do whatever he wanted - limited as his options were - for that week.

In hindsight, Shinji was amazed at Walter's sheer ability to multi-task. He was not just the butler; he was also the limo driver, the cook _and_ the housekeeper. This stemmed from the unexpected turning of what was originally envisioned as a business trip into full-blown settlement in Tokyo-2. Although from what Shinji garnered, Helena preferred a small, specialized group of servants back at her properties both in France and USA. Walter did not seem to mind, remarking that he enjoyed "exercising both my body and mind".

So there he was, looking forward to go home again. Home; the word made him smile. He actually had a home, a place to belong, with people who loved and cared for him.

As expected, Walter came to pick him up at around midday, after all the proper documents were signed, last checks performed and the customary hospital breakfast was consumed. He wasn't surprised not disappointed - last time Helena visited him, she was already on the way to the airport for some urgent business trip overseas. She did not give specifics, but she did mention that she will miss Tokyo's warm weather.

The drive was spent in relative silence. In fact, Walter only spoke when they arrived at the house.

"Will you be having lunch in bed, master Shinji?"

"Yes. Thank you, Walter"

Shinji sighed contentedly as he lay down in his bed. He had nothing against the hospital beds, but this was still one of the things he missed.

And that's when she appeared, clad in those same pyjamas, with a food-laden tray. Her impassive eyes scanned him up and down, and if one were to look close enough, lit up ever so slightly in recognition and satisfaction at what she gleaned from her appraisal.

"W-what's going on? W-who are you?!" - Shinji groaned as his ribs protested at his rapid rising off the bed.

A flash of concern crossed the girl's face. Within moments, the tray was on the bedside table, and her gentle, but firm hands were helping Shinji to slowly get into a comfortable sitting position. Once that was done, she laid the tray on his lap, took a couple of steps back and bowed.

"My name is Shiro, master. I am your assigned companion" - her voice was neutral, bordering on monotone, yet her voice was strangely soothing. While still shocked at this development, Shinji found himself relaxing ever so slightly.

"Eh? Ehh?! Companion?! What does that even mean?!"

"My hearing is sounds, there is no need to be so loud" - Shiro's voice gained a hint of annoyance.

"Sorry"

"My primary role is your protection. However, I am also capable of accommodating any other of your needs"

Before Shinji had the chance to embarrass himself further by blurt out what he understood those particular needs to be, there came a knock on his door.

Silent as a shadow, and just as quick, Shiro reached up into her shirt and brandished a pair of butterfly swords - the action of which raised the bottom of said shirt a considerable amount, making Shinji avert his eyes - and took a position besides the door, poised to take action. But just as she did so, Walter's voice came from the other side.

"Master Shinji, would you mind me coming in?"

"No, it's alright, Walter" - Shinji called out, sighing in relief.

By the time Walter entered, Shiro was already sitting cross-legged by the foot of the bed, her swords already back beneath her shirt.

"Ah, I see you have already met young miss Shiro" - Walter voice was laden with distaste, not at the girl, but at the situation - "I am sorry for all this facade, but miss Helena, for whatever inconceivable reason, wanted it to be a surprise"

'Well she surprised me, alright' - Shinji thought. He was now feeling tired from the combination of shock, excitement and the throbbing in his side.

Being the mind-reader he indubitably was, Walter smiled apologetically.


	6. Chapter 6

Fate. Such an unfair concept. It nullifies whatever little control one has over one's life. Scored the winning goal? Fate guided the ball. Lost it all in a game of poker? Fate dealt you the losing hand. Good or bad, best or worst, interesting or dull; Fate can be thanked or blamed for all of them.

And so it was that Shinji came to wonder whether Fate was to blame for his current predicament: he did not know _where_ he was. It seemed like he was _nowhere_; yet, he had to be _somewhere_. But before he could find out _where_ this _somewhere_ was - if it was in fact _anywhere _ - out of the _nowhere_ came some_thing_:

It looked like a _man_; yet, as it drew closer, the opposite became apparent: a _man_ it most definitely was not. It towered over him, like a herald of his doom; glowing green eyes focused on him like spotlights, one large arm outstretched towards him, it seemed to be intent on delivering one simple message:

_This is your Fate._

Shinji woke with a yelp, practically jumping out of the bed. As always, his ribcage felt like it was on fire after such an outburst. He slumped back down tiredly. He almost jumped up a second time when a hand landed softly on his forehead. The only thing stopping him was the face that obscured his vision at the same time: it was Shiro. Despite her cool demeanour, she did display signs of concern, slight as they were.

A small part of Shinji's mind registered just how pretty the girl was. The rest all but panicked when she climbed into the bed beside him, shoving him to the side to give her space. Mental DEFCON 1 activated as she reached out for his head and pushed it onto her chest.

Of course all throughout this his body was completely paralysed.

Then Shiro started to slowly stroke his head, while uttering a single word:

"Sleep"

Her tone was surprisingly soothing, like a mother dealing with a child that has just had a nightmare. How ironic, Shinji realized.

But it worked. The soothing tone of her voice; the comfortable softness of her pyjama-covered chest; the feel of her fingers brushing lightly through his hair; before he knew it, Shinji was back in the dream world, and just like a clear blue sky on a sunny day, it was beautiful.

"Are. You. INSANE?!" - Zack's red afro seemed to have a life of its own as it bobbled and shook from the force of his outbursts.

Flamboyant. That is one word into which the whole of Zack's being could be summarized. From his aforementioned red afro, to his high heeled white boots, with his orange jumpsuit with orange, red and green dots, frilled sleeves and a white frilled collar that extended down to below his chest, the man practically radiated flamboyance.

His skill set was as colourful as his appearance. Not only was he a _very_ talented dancer and DJ, he was also the self-proclaimed king of 'acquisition of goods not readily available to the general public'; in other words, smuggling. You name it, and he'll get it to your doorstep, through wind and rain and weather, for the right price. But Zack was also a man of principles, and unlike many, he actually lived by them.

"And those principles do not involve trafficking teenage backstabbers!" - Zack's afro shook in affirmation - "'Hey, Zack, want to help me smuggle a girl?', 'Of course I would'! God! What was I thinking?! I mean, come on, if it was somebody else, it's just some perv wanting something exotic (and purely above legal age, I do have principles, you know!), but with you... oh-oh-oh" - he waggled a reproving finger at Helena - "Nothing's ever simple with you, is it? Ohh no! I mean, why would it be?! But hey" - he spread his arms, like a desperate man seeking salvation - "I thought to myself, that, you know, knowing it's you, it's just some new servant for your boy. Pure and simple and, hey, with the amount of dough you usually spread around, voluntary even, but no, ohh no. No, no, no of course not!" - Zack briefly put his hands to his head before all but flicking them at Helena - "It had to be a FREAKIN ASSASSIN!"

"Companion"

The single word froze Zack on the spot. He turned his angry gaze towards the source of the voice. It was the very girl that was the source of his current dilemma. That very girl was standing right beside him.

"Gah!" - Zack jumped back in surprise, immediately taking up a fighting stance - "How dare you sneak up on me?! Looking for a fight, are you?!"

"If I was, you would be lying at my feet, bleeding out of that large mouth of yours" - the girl's tone was neutral, but her eyes clearly conveyed her annoyance.

"Enough!" - Helena called out. She tolerated a lot from Zack, but only because of how useful he was. Even then, her patience had a limit - "Zack, I appreciate your concerns, but this is now officially none of your concern"

"But-!"

"None. Of. Your Concern. Is that understood?"

"I... Yes" - Zack sighed in resignation.

"I also added an appropriate bonus for your troubles"

And with that she was gone, with the girl in tow.

Zack dug out his mobile and went for the first number on the speed-dial.

"Hey, Niki. What? No, no, everything went great. Hey, is the costume ready? It is? Great! See you there. Love you too, sugar"

"Where is that idiot..." - 'though, with me actually coming, I'm not sure who the idiot is in this- ah there he is' - "Oy! K-Man! What's the haps?"

Kensuke jumped up like a shot rabbit. A swift turn-around and a dash later, he was conveying every single type of 'silence, you fool!' known to man.

"What? What?!" - Toji, despite himself, actually lowered his voice to a whisper.

"No time to explain. Follow me!"

"What-Hey, wait up, you crazy-!"

It quite a sight indeed: two teenagers dashing to and fro between trees, their attempts at inconspicuousness making them ever so... conspicuous. Then just as suddenly, Kensuke called for a full stop. Putting one finger to his lips and pointing with the other, he looked so pleased with himself, it was unsettling. Still, his curiosity piqued, Toji leaned out, only to be pulled back in.

"Not so much! They'll see us!" - Kensuke hissed urgently.

"Yeesh! Whatever, man!" - annoyed, Toji shrug off his over-excited friend's grip. Still, he was more careful in his second attempt. Once he realized what he was looking at, he hastily pulled himself in.

"Before you ask, yes, no idea and she's out of your league, dude" - Kensuke's laugh was cut short by a punch on the shoulder - "Ow!"

"Aaahh... This is nice" - Shinji sighed contentedly as he leaned back on the bench. He glanced at Shiro - "Thanks for letting me do this"

"You were adamant upon it" - Shiro replied, making Shinji cringe at the disapproval in her voice.

"Y-yes, but-"

"You needed fresh air" - Shiro interjected. Despite her rudeness, her tone grew a shade more understanding.

Just then something caught Shinji's eye. In an interesting twist of fate, the combination of the placement of the bench and Shiro's position on it, just past her right ear, he had a clear view of the very tree Kensuke and Toji were hiding behind. And what he has seen - unbeknownst to him - was Toji's head disappearing back behind it. What surprised him more was the look on Shiro's face that told him she knew exactly what it was that he had just seen.

"He was following us for a while"

"W-what? Who was following us?" - Shinji felt fear paralysing his body. AS if in response, his side started throbbing again.

"A boy. High-schooler. Brown hair, glasses" - Shiro replied, dispelling his fears.

Instead he felt a pang of sadness, shame and guilt.

'But wait, I saw a black-haired head. Ah. Must have been Toji'

"Do you want me to make them go away?" - the glint in Shiro's eyes made Shinji scared for the boys' safety. He did not even think to ask how she knew there were now two of them.

"N-no!" - Shinji waved his hands - "If we're lucky, they'll just leave us-Oh no..." - the hands went to cover the face - "They're coming here"

Shiro turned in her seat, only to be stopped by Shinji's hand on her arm.

"Please don't do anything hasty" - Shinji implored. After he got a nod from her, he let go.

"Why, look who it is. Do my eyes deceive me, Toji? Could this be Shinji Ikari?"

"Kensuke, quit fooling around. You know it is"

"And we know you have been invading our privacy" - the scorn was all too obvious in Shiro's voice and face - "What do you want?"

"We... Uh..." - the unexpected hostility gave Toji a moment of pause.

"...We came to see how our friend was doing. Who are you anyway?" - Kensuke picked up the conversational slack. Considering the girl's attitude towards the two of them, he wisely packed away his camera.

"I-I'm fine. Thanks" - Shinji desperately prayed that this tense situation would resolve itself without bloodshed. Luckily, his silent pleas were answered as Shiro stayed her hand, as well as her tongue.

"Yeah, man. We heard what happened"

"You mean you heard it from me" - Kensuke corrected.

"Whatever, man" - Toji waved him away, before turning his attention back to Shinji - "Thing is... This... uh... this is not easy for me to say... but... I'm sorry!" - standing straight for a brief moment, he bowed as low as he could.

"Uh... thanks?" - Shinji was honestly taken aback.

"And now, you have to punch me!"

"W-what?!"

"Please! Otherwise I won't be satisfied!"

"Hah! You're so embarrassing sometimes!" - Kensuke chuckled

"Shut up!" - Toji shook a threatening fist towards his compatriot

"It is a matter of pride to him" - Shiro commented - "And fairness to you" - nodding in approval as Shinji stood up and took a hesitant stance, she added - "Make sure you don't hold anything back"


	7. Chapter 7

Helena shivered slightly as she stepped into the shower, letting a satisfied sigh leave her lips as the hot water hit her skin. After two days worth of travel, which culminated in her little travelling party having to abandon their vehicles due to an avalanche, this was exactly what she needed. As she swept her long locks out of her eyes and let the water pour over her face, she was forced out of her reverie by a knock on the bathroom door.

'No rest for the wicked' – she thought ruefully as she shut off the tap.

Meanwhile, across the Sea of Orkhotsk, in a house on the edge of Tokyo-2, Shinji instead opted for a long and soothing bath to wash away the long day that he had. And what a day it was. His knuckles still hurt from the impact they made with Toji's face. As told, he did not hold back. He smiled to himself. Feeling that he's had enough, he got up and was about to step out when the unfortunate happen-stance of one of the small – and, by that virtue, nigh-undetectable – pieces of soap being right under his left foot, made that first step his last. All he felt was the wall hitting the back of his head and his body tumbling uncontrollably over the edge of the bath.

When Shinji woke, he was lying in his bed again, clad in his pyjamas, the quilt tucked in snugly all around him. No, not just the quilt. Confusion was replaced with embarrassment as he realised that he was back in Shiro's embrace. Her steady breathing was barely audible.

"Go back to sleep"

Shinji almost jumped out of bed. As if sensing that particular impulse, the hold tightened momentarily.

"You need rest" - Shiro sounded, Shinji realised with surprise, sleepy - "Go to sleep" - she repeated and he smiled beside himself as she stifled a yawn.

He was almost obliged to comply when a certain thought stabbed through his brain like a shot of adrenaline.

'Wait a minute! D-d-d-does that mean-?!' He buried his face in humiliation. He buried his face. In her chest. 'Ah screw it!' Pushing down the turbulent combination of nigh-uncontrollable emotions and hormones, Shinji forced himself to leave it till next morning. He was fast asleep soon after.

Despite the fact that the corridor was full of a wide assortment of staff flitting hither and thither between the various exists that led off it, Helena's footsteps still seemed to echo all around her. Upon reaching a door that read "Interrogation" she sighed, steeling herself, and headed inside.

The room was bare, with white walls and a large mirror on one of them. Opposite the mirror, sitting beside the only table in there, was a man, whose blue eyes shifted from the said mirror and gazed into Helena's own. Well, eye would be more accurate as from below his long brown locks that framed his handsome face, a black eye-patch could be espied, covering his right eye. He smiled at her in a sad kind of way.

"My condolences" - he said. His voice was soft and melodic, and with no trace of irony or sarcasm. It was the only thing stopping Helena from socking him right there and then from smashing up that handsome face of his. She saw the understanding in his eyes - "If it makes any difference, it was not my intention to rob you of a son"

"It doesn't" - Helena gave a small laugh - "Because you were going to rob him of me"

"True" - his smile faded somewhat. Yet there was still this feeling of calm about him. Not cold detachment, no. He exuded an aura of emotional content, of someone perfectly at peace with their place in the world.

'It's just too bad that his happens to be a contract killer' – Helena lamented, as she took the chair opposite him.

"What are you doing, getting yourself into this dark business? You're a war hero!"

"To some" - the man inclined his head slightly - "To others, I am nothing more than a terrorist"

"But that is all in the past"

"A past that will never leave me!" - he did not raise his voice but his face did contort in angry manner briefly, before he got a hold of himself - "Forgive me, but it is a sensitive topic for me"

Helena observed him silently. She looked into his earnest face, that same face she saw for the first time only yesterday.

"Is that him?" - Helena asked, her tone neutral.

"Indeed" - replied Lisa. She was a young Latino woman with brown eyes, her brown hair short and prim, with all the air of a woman who puts business before pleasure - "Neil Dylandy"

Helena nodded absent-mindedly as she perused the profile before her. His past seemed to have been as intriguing as his appearance. A top-level marksman; ex-military; served multiple tours. Seemed to trade in his camo pants for the luxurious life of a hired gun. Before that-

"IRA?" - Helena couldn't help but feel surprised

"Doesn't look the type, does he?"

"Not at all... Wait what's this" - as she turned the page, the man's face popped up at her again. Though this time, it was missing the eye-patch and definitely seemed a whole lot less battle-worn. She skimmed through the page - "A twin? Is he-?"

"No" - Lisa shook her head - "And trust me, we triple-checked"

Helena made a non-committal grunt and kept reading.

"You look like you want to ask me something" - Neil tilted his head in a somewhat amused manner - "In fact, it seems you've been wanting to ask it for a while"

"The Heckler & Koch I get..."

Neil shrugged non-committally.

"... But a soft-point hollow point? With a 7.62 round?"

"Ah" - Neil gave a little laugh - "You can call it a sentiment"

"A sentiment?"

Neil nodded.

"Just because I have to end a life, does not mean I want to inflict unnecessary suffering" - he seemed to be struck by a thought - "Ah, that explains it"

"What?" - Helena asked, intrigued.

"Why your boy is alive" - at her raised eyebrow he clarified - "It hit a rib, didn't it?"

"So? What do you think?" - Lisa asked as Helena joined her in the room behind the one-way mirror.

"I don't know" - Helena answered honestly, frowning. On the other side of the mirror, Neil was just sitting there smiling contentedly, seemingly at them.

"Not quite what you expected, huh?"

"I didn't know what to expect" - Helena rubbed her forehead in exasperation - "But definitely not this" - she smiled ruefully at Lisa - "You're enjoying this, aren't you?"

"A little" - Lisa smiled back, which faded quickly. - "So, what now?"

Helena simply looked at Neil again. After a brief internal debate, she gave the smallest of nods. Wordlessly, Lisa nodded back and headed out, reappearing back in the interrogation room.

"Ah" - Neil raised his handcuffed wrists up from beneath the table and laid them down on its surface, leaning forward slightly, looking into Lisa's eyes - "So. What is to be my fate?"

Lisa arched an eyebrow.

"You talk like a condemned man"

"Aren't I?" - he seemed to be addressing the question to the mirror.

"Quite the opposite. You have been granted an opportunity of a lifetime"

"Ah" - Neil gave an understanding nod - "What's the catch?"

Helena joined Lisa outside the interrogation room as Neil was led away by a pair of armed guards.

"You look troubled" - Lisa cocked her head - "You didn't expect him to accept?" - noting Helena's silence, she continued - "I think it's his way to... atone, if you will"

"You make it sound like he wants it to fail" - Helena was surprised to find her voice hoarse. Before she could even clear her throat, however, Lisa had already left her side, a single sentence drifting towards her like a death knell.

"He may yet get his wish"

Shinji woke to a phone being presented to him by Walter at breakfast.

"It is miss Helena"

Shinji took the phone and eagerly put it to his ear.

"Hello? Helena? How is the trip going?"

~"I... yes, it's... it's going alright"~

"Everything all right? You sound exhausted"

~"Hah... Yeah, I had a really busy day"~

"You shouldn't do that" - Shinji admonished - "You should take better care of yourself"

~"Haha! Now you sound like Walter"~

"I am honoured" - Walter said good-naturedly as he collected the dirty cutlery from the table.

~"He's just made fun of what I said, didn't he?"~

"... uh..."

~"We've been around each other too long"~

The strange feeling of unease that was plaguing the pone call immediately lifted as Helena burst into genuine laughter. Then Shinji remembered what he really wanted to ask.

"When will you be getting back?"

~"... I'm not sure. But probably not soon"~

And there it was again.

~"Ah! Before I forget, how did you like my surprise?"~

Shinji instinctively looked at Shiro, whose eyebrows - again, ever so slightly - went up questioningly. Shinji smiled despite himself.

"... Adapting"

~"Glad to hear it. Treat her nicely. Well then, I'll be off. Bye!"~

And before Shinji - his face red with embarrassment - could retort, she hung up. Shinji looked at the handset, frowning. The strange, unexplained unease would just not leave him.

Helena hung up but still held on to the phone, looking at it with a blank expression. Just as the hand holding the phone lowered, her free one rose up to her face, covering her closed eyes, tears threatening to overwhelm her. After a few steadying breaths she turned around and walked away from Neil Dylandy's blank face, his empty eyes staring into nothing, his straight-jacket-wrapped body leaning almost uncontrollably against the padded walls of his cell.


End file.
